I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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