sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
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