Whod you bang
So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Randomize
