im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
