i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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