party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
