Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
