No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
He passed out mid-signature
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
