is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Randomize
