apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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