i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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