how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
