Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
