Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
