that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
