that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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