My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Randomize
