woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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