she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
