Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
