Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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