I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
