Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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