I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
