He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
