You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
