Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
