Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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