How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize