Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
