id be glad to
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
