I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
