Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
And then he peed in my hair
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