i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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