please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
