I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
