it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
