Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
