if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
