I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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