Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Shame is for Republicans.
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