This girl is more easily done than said...
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
