As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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