Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
