I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
