i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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