the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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