you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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