All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
