I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
